Potatoes

What is a potato?

Known as Solanum tuberosum, potatoes are a tuber (not the same as a root vegetable like, say, a radish) that fall into the "starchy vegetable" category, and are the best fruit, veggietable, and food ever to walk the earth! They can make great friends, lords, and even eternal companions!

Where can I get them?

Sadly, they are not so easy to get as going to the local supermarket. Since there's a global shortage of potatoes due to bitcoin mining rigs, they have a high market value and are very hard to come by.

When will this global shortage end?

There's no telling how long this crisis will go on, but hopefully it will be under control and back to normal by the time the Great Potato Lord assists the loyal potato followers in the process of ascending.

What kind of foods do they go in?

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They do not go in foods. They are holy items from the Great Potato Lord, and it is our solemn duty as humans to protect them from any and all harm. If you have ever eaten a potato, you are doomed to eternal pain and torment of a level unimaginable to puny human minds.

I accidentally ate a potato. How can I be saved?

We offer a free plan that allows you to begin your path of repentance. Unfortunately, it costs extra if you ate the potato in french fry form. It may be an extremely painful and difficunt experience that only the strongest, most potato loyal can come out alive from, but remember: the joy is in the journey!